Tears, Dreams, & Trampolines

At some point in your childhood, or even as an adult, I'm sure you've had a special place to go think, dream, or cry. Face it there is a part in all of us that needs to find a place where we can find solace or inspiration. For some of us its our bedroom, a garden, the car, perhaps even deep in the pages of a good book. For me it was a trampoline.

It seemed that growing up the one thing we always had in our yard was a trampoline. My brother, my sister, and I spent 75% of our childhood bouncing around on a trampoline. However, it wasn't in the daylight during the slip 'n' slides, or the popcorn games that made this bouncy contraption so dear to me. It began at dusk, as the sun was all but gone in the sky, my dad home from work and wore out from playing with us three kids in the yard. You see my dad is famous for making up simple games that would entertain us for hours; such as rolling a marble down a felt lined tray from my mothers cedar chest and competing to see who's marble could roll the farthest. It was my dad's idea to climb up onto the trampoline, lay on our backs, heads together and peer up at the ever darkening sky to see who could catch a glimpse of the first star to make an appearance for the night. We would lay there, still and silent, eyes trained on the sky until suddenly "I see it!" one of us would say, we would point while the other squinted until they could make out the faint light of the first star.

It was a ritual that we partook in many a times througout my childhood. As I grew older I would find myself on the trampoline at night, on my back, looking up at the millions of stars overhead. There were times that I just wanted to lay there and marvel at the wonder of so many stars so close and yet so far away. There were times when I would want to be alone, somewhere could think and try to sort through whatever issue I was facing. I have never thought about the trampoline being my special place until tonight. My children have inherited my love for the trampoline and so I have one in my backyard. I was in a moment when I needed solace and comfort. So I slipped on my shoes and trudged through the damp grass to the trampoline, and instead of jumping I sat down and tilted my head back to look up at a sky bright with stars. Many times I have spoken aloud, whether praying to God or simply talking to the stars I'm not sure, but both are great listeners. I have ranted and cried on that black top, I have laughed and snuggled with kids and hubby on there as well.

As I came back inside, still feeling a bit sad and lonely, I thought of that trampoline....and of all the good times I've had on it. I thought about my little brother and sister, of my mom and dad. Of the games, the fights, the wrestling matches. Sometimes I wish I could go back to when life was simpler and I could lay on my back on that trampoline at dusk with my daddy and patiently wait for the first sign of nighfall, but I can't. I can only remember those times that we had together, and every time I go out to the trampoline I'll remember everything from tears & laughter. I will try to make those same memories with my three kids and hope that one day they will look back at the times on their trampoline with fondness. I hope that each and every one of you find that place of inspiration in your lives, that place that you can cry in, feel hopeless in, feel happy, romantic, sad, loved, alone, or excited in. We all need some sort of place to call our own and for me...it's a simple trampoline.



Me & My Daddy